Every time I get around you my heart races and my mind narrows and my eyes dart from side to side, looking everywhere but your eyes. Because I know that if I look into your eyes, I'll want you, even more than I already want you, and I know that I can't have you. You plague me and frustrate me and see straight through me. And I hate you for it. And I love that you do it. I'm so vulnerable when I'm around you. I feel out of control. So, I step back and breathe and wait until I can dive back into you again. It's a good hurt, it's a terrorizing hurt. I know that she is perfect for you. I know that I'd be a menace to you and you an impediment to me. But fact does not alter feeling. No matter how hard I try to ignore my racing heart, it continues to pulse and nag and want. You. You are my burden and she is your strength. I am your fantasy and she is your reality. I feel your heart beat too. Not as strong, but I feel it beat. It is out of pace with mine. It laughs, mine screams. You are relaxed. I am collapsed at the will of my heart; it is stronger than me. So be easy with me. I'm trying. I'm trying to pull my heart back into my chest. Be easy with me.